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Welcome ! | Home · FAQ · Topics · Web Links · Your Account · Submit Poetry · Top 30 · OldSite Link | 29-May 18:08:40 AEST | ||
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Array
(
[sid] => 125645
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => haha, i'm free
[time] => 2006-09-12 11:55:33
[hometext] =>
[bodytext] => I sometimes wonder how it all happened, that I am in a constant state of searching. searching for this ultimate secret that answers all life's questions, a secret that unleashes your true potential once and for all. everytime I thought I had it, it proves to be but a mirage, my hopes systematically crushed, depression sets in like the solitary blue. I sometimes blame god for this constant futile searching, yet he remains silent. I sometimes blame my parents for not raising me properly, yet they remain the same. I sometimes blame the kids that bullied me when I was small, yet the past can not change. I sometimes blame myself for being so weak, yet I remain weak. I see the light at the end, but every time I take a step, it gets dim. this constant state of depression drives me deeper into depression, I feel I am going to be forever trapped in this vortex of chaos. I want to let go, but I can't, I can't let go, but I want to. I can let go, but I don't want to. I don't want to let go, but I can. I am so confused I wish I explode, into a billion pieces of nothingness. I still wonder how it all came to be, a person so unhappy in this world. everything remains still, I become the silence [comments] => 1 [counter] => 166 [topic] => 32 [informant] => ZforZachariah [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => SadPoetry )
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