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Array
(
[sid] => 125600
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Failed
[time] => 2006-09-11 07:58:42
[hometext] => Two of my close friends commited sucide when i was away and i couldnt be there to go to there funeral or stop them...so i wrote this when i thought of joining them but im still here...rip Ian & Amanda
[bodytext] => My emotions are dulled with an unbearable pain I've cried more tears then there are drops of rain You took your lives because you could not take anymore I've been there so many times I just couldn’t walk through the door Now that you have taken the step its seems so easy to do You don’t know how much I want to follow so I can still be with you So I lie here alone my heart crying so much you could never know I just don’t see why it got so hard for you to deal that you felt you have to go Still to shocked to realize that it is true and to scared to believe But I know it will hit hard soon enough leaving me to silently grieve Life is stuck in a endless haze that races by me so fast You have joined the others that keep my tied to my painful past You make it so hard to forget you and so hard to move on with my life And now you have given me your escape and expect me to handle your knife I cant handle such a burden without slowly killing all those that still care At least I know I’m not alone unlike you they promise to always be there To catch me when I stumble and pick me up when I fall I was always there for you and you were never there for me as I recall But that don’t matter to me all I wanted was to help you through But I failed and now I realize there really was nothing I could do I will never forget you and because of you I will surely cry I just wish I had a chance before you left to say a simple good bye [comments] => 5 [counter] => 179 [topic] => 36 [informant] => Nothingness [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 34 [ratings] => 7 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Suicide )
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