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Array
(
[sid] => 125470
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Tormented Remain
[time] => 2006-09-08 02:47:41
[hometext] => This is about what I'm going through now as I wait to turn 18 and get a fresh new start and a chance to prove my worth to the world.
[bodytext] => No where I can go where I can be free Tossed about Floating Once belonged don’t want me My once homes now foreign forbidden places So many past present blurring faces Everyone’s gawking Watching To see Me collapse Plunge Weep Hating me Using me as a step to rise Desperate lies They all think they know All about me My type My ways All I’m good for But they don’t know me and my pain Unjustness of it driving me insane Keeps me going They don’t know the effect of their scorn The flesh I’ve felt torn The salt I’ve tasted The chances they’ve wasted The cut-throats Nobodies of the future Giving in to youth’s false allure On their high pedestal Their ruthless play so cruel Need to unwind For their act they’ll never find Other ways than using others Those who trusted you Betrayal you can never undo Entire life has gotten off track Now I’m too astray to get back When there’s a left or a right When there’s no sign in sight And one will take me home Both are dark Scars are yet to make their mark But you can’t see ahead And last time you bled Always find the wrong one When reversal can’t be done Of those both one way streets Rat-a-ta-ta the death drum beats Now they fade into regrets Life’s chock full of unpaid debts Things that got me off the road The books of mistranslated code Made life what it is today Too easy the avoided way Then there are those things I couldn’t have saved The paths of which weren’t mine to pave The cruelty tears my heart From me they’re ripping my past apart Not meaning the same to them as it does to me Not realizing they’re too blinded by their own deceit to see Always taking taking taking This is what I get back Yet they made me into the art I am I thank them at least for that For though it is in essence what brought me down It is also my jeweled crown In essence what also keeps me up Pushing For what I’ve got to give I can’t wait to give it Yet I do everyday I’ve been beat along the way Molested and used It was my pride you abused Now I’m here looking up ahead This old skin I can’t wait to shed What I see Dark Shadows Unknown Yet there is a light I hope it`s really there Not just an illusion Of stars in my hair It’s growing slowly nearer Closer to my dearer Dreams of freedom dawning Now doth the choir of glories sing My release Aquarium to sea It’s okay to be me A chance to begin anew After years of paying what’s due The time come of only mirth When I reach the day of my rebirth [comments] => 4 [counter] => 220 [topic] => 75 [informant] => mashuganagal [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 9 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 0 [associated] => [topicname] => anguished )
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