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Array
(
[sid] => 124697
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => She Broke Up With Me On Myspace, Oo-dalay!
[time] => 2006-08-20 16:31:37
[hometext] =>
[bodytext] => With a curt click started the whine, That would lead soon to the end of “our” time. And with a soft push did the screen lit on, To display to me, digitally, how I was wrong. Oh, look a message did pop on! To show I had a message on Myspace.com. So I quickly went and typed in my name and password, hooray! And my assigned page came to display. Oh! How wonderful!! Glory to me!! A nice lovely love note from my love, my dearest… my ex-girlfriend to be. I clicked the link excited, expecting the best… Yet what I soon read left a dark deep weight upon my chest. “With tears in my eyes,” she wrote, “I know not how to say… that I need closure with you on the subject of 'us' today.” This is not quite the way I had planned it to be… “My dearest,” it went, “the word us, no longer includes you and me.” So I continued to read, to maybe better understand… That by nights end, "we" would include only me and my hand. “In case you don’t get it, I choose to terminate, This boorish, un-exciting… drowning union of late.” “You did not walk me to the door,” she quipped, “as tipsy as I was, I could have been hurt or kidnapped, or worse, mugged with my odds.” “Respect of me, last night you did not show.” Must’ve been while I was dancing with that girl… “That hoe!” “Biggest thing of all,” she droned, “on top of all else that went bad… The you not caring about my ass, is what made me most mad.” Now I remember her saying about my friend and her ass, But enjoying friends and my drunken stupor, I quickly let it pass. Apparently quite grievous was that act, For what I’m sure was fiction, she saw as fact. “In speaking, his hand began from my waist, and slowly… slithely lowered to sneak him a taste.” “On my hind it brushed that once, Jesus Christ!! And not only brushed it once, but it brushed it twice!” Now I had some to drink, only a few… No more than one, but it could’ve been two… I might of said, “Don’t worry babe,” as I stirred my ice, “At least he did not brush it thrice.” Oh… so many of those butts were abound, There was ass in the air and ass on the ground. “If it bothers you, just stay away…” and it could have been those words that leave me in heartache today. And so her note ended, not so sweet, As she requested that from my page, she, I delete. So I sat staring bewildered at my screen, Fleeting were the thoughts of a warm loving scene. A small crack on my heart did begin to form, As the love was stripped away leaving me alone and unadorned. My heart hath shaken, my heart hath shattered, My heart hath lain wilted and battered. And the reality quickly set in, As this was as a loss, with only little win. For she did embarrass me in front of the boys, As she stood there defiantly poised. And spoke with a venomous boom and oozing flow: “I think I am ready to go!” So tail between legs I turned and left, Leaving the lads to imaginatively create an epithet. And make fun they did, all the way home, As text message after text message blew up my phone. For God’s sake, she broke up with me on Myspace, Oo-dalay!! Broke up and left alone today. And with those words, at my heart, she did strike, The words my sweet love’s lovely hands did type. So in hindsight I realize and will tell, That friends and love don’t mix too well. And next time, if girl, on my fun doth drab… I will keep my pride and send girly girl girl home via taxi cab. [comments] => 6 [counter] => 219 [topic] => 7 [informant] => aquaelius [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 6 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 0 [associated] => [topicname] => HumorPoetry )
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