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Array
(
[sid] => 123557
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => He crammed things ** ** ***
[time] => 2006-07-22 19:43:10
[hometext] => I got the idea for this fictional poem after watching Beavis and Butt-head.
[bodytext] => My stupid son was making prank calls. The man he was calling was appalled. The man finally got caller ID. After finding my address in the phone book, he beat the hell out of me. He kicked down my door and saw me using my cell phone. He thought I was the prank caller and he started breaking my bones. When he got done, he crammed my phone up my ***. He said he was tired of being harassed. Unfortunately for me the situation didn't end. My son started making prank calls again. The man returned and crammed a broken beer bottle up my ***. It really hurt because whenever I moved, I got cut by the glass. I got rid of all of my phones and thought things would get better. But my son started mailing the man prank letters. The man came back again and again. After my eigth trip to the proctologist, my patience was wearing thin. I told the man it was my son but he thought I was lying. Every time he shoved something up my ***, I started crying. My butt still hurts and it's a little raw. I sent my son to live with his Grandma. But one week later she went insane. She said sending my son to her was inhumane. When my boy returned to my house, he was in for a shock. He couldn't get in because I changed the locks. After staying with a friend, he was arrested and sent to juvenile hall. He played a prank with his one and only call. [comments] => 4 [counter] => 265 [topic] => 7 [informant] => randyjohnson [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => HumorPoetry )
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