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Array ( [sid] => 115813 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Our Love [time] => 2006-03-04 10:13:25 [hometext] => I know the fourth one doesn't really ryme ...but tell me what you think anyhow please and thank you. [bodytext] => He held me close,
Closer than I'd ever been held before.
He asked for one small kiss,
And not a thing more.

I gave him the kiss,
The kiss that was my first.
I longed to give him so much more,
For I felt as though my passion might burst.

We fell into love that day,
That day we had our first kiss.
We fell into it fast,
Not sure if it was only romantic bliss.

He held me close,
And asked for one small kiss.
I gave him the kiss,
And longed to give him so much more.

We fell into love that day,
And fell into it fast.
But to our dismay,
Our love did not last. [comments] => 2 [counter] => 197 [topic] => 2 [informant] => Cold_Blue_Eyes [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 5 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => LovePoetry )

Our Love

Contributed by Cold_Blue_Eyes on Saturday, 4th March 2006 @ 10:13:25 AM in AEST
Topic: LovePoetry

He held me close,
Closer than I'd ever been held before.
He asked for one small kiss,
And not a thing more.

I gave him the kiss,
The kiss that was my first.
I longed to give him so much more,
For I felt as though my passion might burst.

We fell into love that day,
That day we had our first kiss.
We fell into it fast,
Not sure if it was only romantic bliss.

He held me close,
And asked for one small kiss.
I gave him the kiss,
And longed to give him so much more.

We fell into love that day,
And fell into it fast.
But to our dismay,
Our love did not last.

Copyright Â© Cold_Blue_Eyes ... [ 2006-03-04 10:13:25]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Our Love (User Rating: 1 )
by Brasco on Saturday, 4th March 2006 @ 12:44:42 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

I don’t think the forth one not rhyming takes much away from the poem. The reader defiantly knows where you are coming from and can relate. Keep writing and expressing yourself.

Re: Our Love (User Rating: 1 )
by Wachumiri on Tuesday, 7th March 2006 @ 01:29:11 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

While reading the poem, I didn't even notice that the forth didn't rhyme, so it doesn't matter. I liked the poem, it read well.
Take care.
David

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