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Array ( [sid] => 115017 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => MaY aS WeLL bE dEaD [time] => 2006-02-18 20:30:40 [hometext] => My First Entry in a long time... writers block! Just about the way i feel right now... please comment! [bodytext] => I may as well be dead,
Close my eyes and do the deed,
Escape from my messed up mind,
Finally be free.

Sick of being nice,
Making everybody happy but me,
Never feeling like Ive done enough,
Never feeling like I can just be me.

Watching every move I make,
Planning every word I say,
Its not a life Im living anymore.

Dont even know who I am,
Cant even begin to remember the real me.

So I sit here feeling alone and helpless,
Wanting to escape this life of make believe,
Staring at this knife,
Mad at myself because I cant make the first move.

I may as well be dead,
Slash my wrist and get it over with,
But all I can think about is the people around me,
And how theyd hate me even more,
If I went through with this planned escape.

I may as well be dead,
But even then I will never be free... [comments] => 4 [counter] => 237 [topic] => 48 [informant] => Delusions [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 8 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => EmotionalPoetry )

MaY aS WeLL bE dEaD

Contributed by Delusions on Saturday, 18th February 2006 @ 08:30:40 PM in AEST
Topic: EmotionalPoetry

I may as well be dead,
Close my eyes and do the deed,
Escape from my messed up mind,
Finally be free.

Sick of being nice,
Making everybody happy but me,
Never feeling like Ive done enough,
Never feeling like I can just be me.

Watching every move I make,
Planning every word I say,
Its not a life Im living anymore.

Dont even know who I am,
Cant even begin to remember the real me.

So I sit here feeling alone and helpless,
Wanting to escape this life of make believe,
Staring at this knife,
Mad at myself because I cant make the first move.

I may as well be dead,
Slash my wrist and get it over with,
But all I can think about is the people around me,
And how theyd hate me even more,
If I went through with this planned escape.

I may as well be dead,
But even then I will never be free...

Copyright © Delusions ... [ 2006-02-18 20:30:40]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: MaY aS WeLL bE dEaD (User Rating: 1 )
by drtylilsecret on Saturday, 18th February 2006 @ 09:33:35 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

omg, i loved that poem. So.... i dunno, real. I've been feeling like that all the time lately, so thank you for that, perfect timing!

~natalya

Re: MaY aS WeLL bE dEaD (User Rating: 1 )
by OzChick on Sunday, 19th February 2006 @ 12:20:10 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Oh boy, I've felt ilke this before, glad I don't now.
Hang in there and stay strong. Great poem.

~Jenny~

Re: MaY aS WeLL bE dEaD (User Rating: 1 )
by VivreAmoureuxMourir on Sunday, 19th February 2006 @ 10:47:03 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

This is amazing..
I know how you feel.

Re: MaY aS WeLL bE dEaD (User Rating: 1 )
by tWiStLe on Monday, 17th July 2006 @ 09:45:26 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Havn't seen or spoke 2 u in sooooooo long, so ur writing is one way i feel like i have... after reading this i was kinda hoping it wasn't exactly wat ur feelin but then i remembered that ur writing has always come from the heart and thats what makes it so great! I miss ya O.H! *kisses*

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