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Array
(
[sid] => 112432
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Bath of self-destruction
[time] => 2006-01-02 03:20:26
[hometext] => The darkened abyss keeps calling to me...can I resist anymore?
[bodytext] => Steam coats the mirror...bringing blessed self-distortion drips from the faucet echo silent in my head Flames from the candles adding smoke to the illusion reality is vanquished...replaced by welcome dread Stripping off my skin...to bask inside my sorrow bathe myself with visions of decisions I have made Contemplating life...and death...both neverending admitting to the sins for which I've never really paid Aching to the bone...I wash the scars of living see them turning red as I remember how they came Some were quite by chance...others self-inflicted always wanting more like it was just a simple game Acknowledging the past...how I've scarred so many others never really caring they would live with them for life So heartless and so selfish...my past is still the present feeding in the frenzy that can only bring me strife When I reach inside...the wounds are fresh and weeping rubbing them so raw that they bleed into my veins Pulling off the scabs from the ones that started healing tears roll down my face...in despair that never wanes I long to feel the pain...to taste my own corruption bitter and enticing...there's so much it never ends Lowering myself into the bath of self-destruction close my eyes and see that I can never make amends I feel it flowing freely...mixing gently with the waters candle wax is running down the sides in bloody trails My breath is getting weaker...and weaker by the moment reality is dimming...now replaced by shadowed veils And so I breathe my last as my head slips underwater ignoring all the pleas as my body fights my soul Deep inside the darkness...I succumb to my desire numbing and delicious...my future pays the toll That was how they found me...face down below the water Some of them were crying...while others were just scared I heard one of them laugh...and say that it was fitting a smile came to my face...I always knew nobody cared [comments] => 6 [counter] => 337 [topic] => 75 [informant] => crow6279 [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 13 [ratings] => 3 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => anguished )
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