Your Poetry Dot Com

Welcome to Your Poetry Dot Com - Read, Rate, Comment on, or Submit Poetry. Browse Poetry Forums, or just enjoy other parts of our poetic community.
One of the largest databases of poetry on the net, now over 198,500+ poems!

Poems On Site: 198,500+ Comments On Poems: 427,000+ Forum Posts: 105,000+

Custom Search


Welcome !	Home · FAQ · Topics · Web Links · Your Account · Submit Poetry · Top 30 · OldSite Link	01-June 10:40:08 AEST

Menu

· Our eBay Store

· Error Submit

Poetry

· Submit Poetry

· Least Read Poems

· Members Listing

· Old Site Post 2001

· Old Site Pre 2001

· Poetry Archive

· Public Domain Poetry

Stories

· Stories (NEW ! )

· Submit Story

· Story Topics

· Stories Archive

· Story Search

Community

· Our Poetry Forums

· Our Arcade
100's of Games !

Site Help

· FAQ

· Feedback

Members Areas

· Your Account

· Members Journals

· Premium Sign-Up

Premium Section

· Special Section

· Premium Poems

· Premium Submit

· Premium Search

· Premium Archive

· Premium Topics

Fun & Games

· Jokes

· Bubble Puzzle

· Cross Word Easy

· Word Hunt

Reference

· Dictionary (Rhyming)

· Site Updates

· Special Content

Search

Top

Help This Site

· Donations

Others

· Moderators

Our Other Sites

· Embroidery Design Store
· Your Jokes
· Special Urls
· JM Embroideries
· Public Domain Poetry and Stories
· Diamond Dotz
· Cooking Info and Recipes
· Quoof - Australian Story

Social

Array ( [sid] => 109999 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Reflection in the Water [time] => 2005-11-18 20:27:47 [hometext] => Rewrite of one of the first poems I posted on the site...if you find this one confusing maybe check out the first one..it's much more straightforward [bodytext] => Gaze deep into the teal abyss
Enveloped in a lucid mist
Feet planted firmly on the cable
Reflection absorbed in the past
Never expecting it to last
I will hold out should I feel able

This life so insignificant
And fuelled by one so ignorant
Shaking hands will hold me high
Yet so important to that one
The prospect of the rising sun
That won’t look down, but to the sky

Though what if I could just jump in,
And bathe in all forgotten sin?
Should hands undo the chains that keep
Or what if I just let me fall?
A memory unto you all
Who falters falls as those who weep

Imperfect now and shattered here
For reasons not remotely clear
On contact, water is cement
To see life from the other side
To know a truth that never lied
Plunge through that wall to deep descent

Reflection through the looking glass
A mirror that I failed to pass
Now understand the life I gave
I watch unchanging, untransformed
While everyday, new theories formed
For another I could save

To be rid of all naivety
To know a life that’s yet to be
I watch with my unmoving eyes
Ignoring each and every doubt
In what this life could be about
To tired hearts and broken ties

Look through the water down below
I walk away to never know
Feet planted firmly on the cable
To move beyond what I can’t see
What is this world if not naïve?
I will hold out for I am able
[comments] => 3 [counter] => 176 [topic] => 21 [informant] => Unbreakable [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 14 [ratings] => 3 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Lifepoems )

Reflection in the Water

Contributed by Unbreakable on Friday, 18th November 2005 @ 08:27:47 PM in AEST
Topic: Lifepoems

Gaze deep into the teal abyss
Enveloped in a lucid mist
Feet planted firmly on the cable
Reflection absorbed in the past
Never expecting it to last
I will hold out should I feel able

This life so insignificant
And fuelled by one so ignorant
Shaking hands will hold me high
Yet so important to that one
The prospect of the rising sun
That won’t look down, but to the sky

Though what if I could just jump in,
And bathe in all forgotten sin?
Should hands undo the chains that keep
Or what if I just let me fall?
A memory unto you all
Who falters falls as those who weep

Imperfect now and shattered here
For reasons not remotely clear
On contact, water is cement
To see life from the other side
To know a truth that never lied
Plunge through that wall to deep descent

Reflection through the looking glass
A mirror that I failed to pass
Now understand the life I gave
I watch unchanging, untransformed
While everyday, new theories formed
For another I could save

To be rid of all naivety
To know a life that’s yet to be
I watch with my unmoving eyes
Ignoring each and every doubt
In what this life could be about
To tired hearts and broken ties

Look through the water down below
I walk away to never know
Feet planted firmly on the cable
To move beyond what I can’t see
What is this world if not naïve?
I will hold out for I am able

Copyright Â© Unbreakable ... [ 2005-11-18 20:27:47]
(Date/Time posted on site)

Advertisments:

Previous Posted Poem | | Next Posted Poem

Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more

All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any comment.
That said, if you find an offensive comment, please contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title etc.

Re: Reflection in the Water (User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on Friday, 18th November 2005 @ 08:45:44 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Ok, I love your rhyme scheme in this, it's rather a nice change from the usual AABB or ABAB I see. I also like how you seem to go in a circle with your words, starting and ending with similar thoughts.

I like how you view things,

Great write,
*hugs*
Phil xxx

Re: Reflection in the Water (User Rating: 1 )
by faith_my_eyes on Saturday, 19th November 2005 @ 09:38:42 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Excellent! The description of you standing on a bridge looking into the water was so strong I was picturing it in my mind. As Phyllis said, the rhyme scheme was great, and the last line was written with conviction. Once again, well done.

Re: Reflection in the Water (User Rating: 1 )
by fielding88 on Saturday, 19th November 2005 @ 01:32:52 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

It's so refreshing to see such a neat bit of rhyming in this write. It wasn't at all conventional, and I very much enjoyed how you were able to change it up here. The best part about this write was the ending, and I just have a thing for good endings. The way with which you linked the final stanza to the first was genius, and the italics in the poem appear to stand alone as their own bit of storytelling, which drives the whole thing. This was just impressive, and the idea of a naive world is a great one. I think it was quite the theme in this write. Excellent re-write, I should hunt down the original.

While every care is taken to ensure the general sites content is family safe, our moderators cannot be in all places; all the time. Please report poetry and or comments that are in breach of our site rules HERE (Please include poem title or url). Parents also please ensure that you supervise your children well when they are on the internet; regardless of what a site says about being, or being considered, child-safe.

Poetry is much like a great photo, a single "moment in time" capturing many feelings and emotions. Yet, they are very alive; creating stirrings within the readers who form visual "pictures" of the expressed emotions within the Poem. Â©

Opinions expressed in the poetry, comments, forums etc. on this site are not necessarily those of this site, its owners and/or operators; but of the individuals who post items to this site.
Frequently Asked Questions | | | Privacy Policy | | | Contact Webmaster

All submitted items are Copyright Â© to their submitter. All the rest Copyright Â© 2002-2050 by Your Poetry Dot Com

All logos and trademarks in this site are property of their respective owners.

Script Generation Time: 0.052 Seconds. - View our Site Map | .© your-poetry.com