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Array
(
[sid] => 108793
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => I'm Trying
[time] => 2005-10-31 03:14:53
[hometext] => For you... (ok, so it's for a couple people . . .my son; the other - i hope she knows who she is)
[bodytext] => I'm trying to be more care free, I'm trying to be more like the old me, I'm trying to find the right words to say what it is I mean; but I'm always finding myself to be at a lack, I'm trying to show a different side of me - to bring the half dead part of me back, I'm trying to show this whole new (ok, so this old dusty) me, I'm trying not to think of the past and the things that happened to me, I'm better than that deep down. . . I know I am - I'm trying so hard to change for you, I'm trying to be better not only for me; but namely for you, I'm trying to wake up from the nightmare that has been my life, I'm trying to open my eyes to a brand new life - I know it's a bit late to finally wake to the year 2005, I'm trying to survive, For you I'm trying with all my might, I'm trying to come out of the darkness; to finally see the light, I'm trying to bury the past; it doesn't matter anymore. . . I'm over comming it for you - I want to be a big part of your life, I'm trying to break these self imposed restraints for you, I'm trying to break down these walls for you - one more hit should do, I'm trying so hard to free myself - for you, I'm trying to be that person I should have been; the one you can always come to, I'm just trying to be me again, I will be me again if you allow it . . . please understand it's going to take awhile - but for you I will be what I once was - I just don't know when, Please just know that I'm trying, Not for me. . . but for you - I'm trying [comments] => 3 [counter] => 710 [topic] => 46 [informant] => BehindHazelEyes [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 15 [ratings] => 3 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => didactic )
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