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Array
(
[sid] => 108571
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => i died the day i became religious
[time] => 2005-10-27 10:54:06
[hometext] => i made my choices... consequences always follow... i should have known that...
[bodytext] => the excuses we make are the reasons we live for because we dont want to admit the real life we live i learned this from experiance i lied to the ones i love i lied to the ones i dont i lied to the ones i trusted and i lied to the one called me i hate to look back at the changes ive made //not because of the change// but because of the disgrace i am to them i look around and see all these happy people i ask myself ''why cant i be like that'' then i realize i am depression is a mind game we role the dice and select our own pawns we choose our happiness and i have chosen mine why did i make the choice i did i have everything i need and yet i loathe the misery i live in this is not what true happiness is sorrow has enveloped my true feelings and sadly without reason save me father save me now i need to live the life i promised you i need to feel the way i felt when i chose the right things i do not have a map to this lonely world but i do have you guiding me leading me what else could i want you are my escape from the escapes i have chosen [comments] => 5 [counter] => 306 [topic] => 11 [informant] => abnormalpunk [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => ChristianPoetry )
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