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Array
(
[sid] => 108464
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Strive To Die
[time] => 2005-10-25 21:35:42
[hometext] => something based on what my friend was feeling before she finally cut deep enough... R.I.P. Anna
[bodytext] => Maybe I'm too tough to do it, Try and try as I might the blade won't cut deep enough, I can bring blood I can cause myself pain, but it's never enough, I want this to end... God end this life that has turned out to be sh*t, Rope tied tight against my throat, One end tied to the door, I'm pulling tight as I lie on the floor, Let me die let me die, I plead he just won't, I feel my face swell my eyes get big, My lips are swollen, My breathing is hard... this is maybe finally God has taken mercy on me, I hold my breath pulling tighter I can feel my windpipe being crushed, This is it.... please let this be it, What the hell I'm still here what more can I do? I cry and beg... God please kill me now I don't want this anymore I'm too tired of fighting end it now pleeeease? Yet I live another day, I wake up thinking this is it this has to be the day, Maybe I'll gain some inner strength and pull tight enough this time, Maybe that blade will sever my artery this time, Please let this be the day, Please end my misery today? [comments] => 7 [counter] => 265 [topic] => 72 [informant] => BehindHazelEyes [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 15 [ratings] => 3 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => self-harmpoetry )
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