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Array ( [sid] => 107727 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Life... [time] => 2005-10-14 16:12:19 [hometext] => This is a poem i made up in my spare time, please rate/comment, and IF YOU HAVE ANY SUGGESTIONS FOR THE ENDING I WOULD LIKE TO HEAR AS I KNOW ITS WEAK.. [bodytext] => Oh god, my life is such a bore,
I want famous people staring at me in awe,
I want my life to be filled with gold,
Many years –that is- before I get old,

Oh god, my life is full of pain,
I want to live a life with some kind of aim,
I want to follow a fairytale road,
One –that is- without a toad,

Oh god, my life is such a chore,
I want a maid to pick things off the floor,
I want an easy ride through,
I can’t –that is- as there’s too much to do,

Oh god, my life is a total bane,
I want to be the strongest in our family chain,
I want to live life to the extreme,
To be –that is- held in the highest esteem,

Oh god, oh god,
Oh why, oh why,
How simple it would be,
Just to lay down and die,
My life is a Ferris wheel,
Spinning round and round,
I’m lost,
I need to be found,
So someone hear my plea,
I’m running…
… Crap,
I’m late for tea!

[comments] => 1 [counter] => 1176 [topic] => 21 [informant] => xoXOSaDiEOXox [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 25 [ratings] => 5 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Lifepoems )

Life...

Contributed by xoXOSaDiEOXox on Friday, 14th October 2005 @ 04:12:19 PM in AEST
Topic: Lifepoems

Oh god, my life is such a bore,
I want famous people staring at me in awe,
I want my life to be filled with gold,
Many years –that is- before I get old,

Oh god, my life is full of pain,
I want to live a life with some kind of aim,
I want to follow a fairytale road,
One –that is- without a toad,

Oh god, my life is such a chore,
I want a maid to pick things off the floor,
I want an easy ride through,
I can’t –that is- as there’s too much to do,

Oh god, my life is a total bane,
I want to be the strongest in our family chain,
I want to live life to the extreme,
To be –that is- held in the highest esteem,

Oh god, oh god,
Oh why, oh why,
How simple it would be,
Just to lay down and die,
My life is a Ferris wheel,
Spinning round and round,
I’m lost,
I need to be found,
So someone hear my plea,
I’m running…
… Crap,
I’m late for tea!

Copyright Â© xoXOSaDiEOXox ... [ 2005-10-14 16:12:19]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Life... (User Rating: 1 )
by Vermilion on Friday, 14th October 2005 @ 04:34:58 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

This was wonderful, you picked on the spoiled, slightly angsty child perfectly. You're right, weak ending, but it's not too bad.
Spoiled brat complaining about wanting it easy, and wanting fame, brilliant. Couldn't have done better myself.

Yours,
Vermilion. (kisskiss)

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