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Array ( [sid] => 103937 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Try Me [time] => 2005-08-19 15:17:29 [hometext] => Ok - This is obviously pouring out of some unsatisfied place in me..........written in a rush so tell me what u think and again, somebody give it a better title! (((HUGS))) juliette [bodytext] => Do not tread so softly across my heart,
Maybe I am craving something wild-
The presence of a twisted melody,
To singe the softness of this smile.
I am aging quickly,
feeling slighted,
With the passing of each new moon.
Imagining for once
not doing the right thing
Might get me up and out of this room.
Now I have never been completely righteous
I do not wear a fallen angels wings,
But my daring side,
so long buried under,
The continued failure
of yesterdays dreams-
So slowly reawakening,
a joyful vision that just might last
Bringing my stranger self back to me
as the hours tiptoe quietly past.
Each ounce of danger
drained from my existence-
Today leaves me hungry
for whatever is in store
So don't hadle me
with the gloves of a child....
I am so much stronger
than you give me credit for!
[comments] => 3 [counter] => 190 [topic] => 21 [informant] => juliette [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 20 [ratings] => 4 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Lifepoems )
Try Me

Contributed by juliette on Friday, 19th August 2005 @ 03:17:29 PM in AEST
Topic: Lifepoems



Do not tread so softly across my heart,
Maybe I am craving something wild-
The presence of a twisted melody,
To singe the softness of this smile.
I am aging quickly,
feeling slighted,
With the passing of each new moon.
Imagining for once
not doing the right thing
Might get me up and out of this room.
Now I have never been completely righteous
I do not wear a fallen angels wings,
But my daring side,
so long buried under,
The continued failure
of yesterdays dreams-
So slowly reawakening,
a joyful vision that just might last
Bringing my stranger self back to me
as the hours tiptoe quietly past.
Each ounce of danger
drained from my existence-
Today leaves me hungry
for whatever is in store
So don't hadle me
with the gloves of a child....
I am so much stronger
than you give me credit for!




Copyright © juliette ... [ 2005-08-19 15:17:29]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: Try Me (User Rating: 1 )
by vibes2go on Friday, 19th August 2005 @ 09:44:00 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
So don't hadle me

did you mean handle?

I loved the tiptoe .. just loved it!!!


Re: Try Me (User Rating: 1 )
by Wachumiri on Saturday, 20th August 2005 @ 02:40:29 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
A Child No More

I liked it, but I also felt the title needed to be... stronger. I hate titles! You finish a great poem, you're about to post it... and you need a title! Frustrating!
Well, I hope you get an awesome title for your awesome poem.
Take care.
David


Re: Try Me (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Sunday, 21st August 2005 @ 12:14:50 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
beautifuly exposed revealing and corageious

lovely work true 2 the heart and bold . . .

Ben




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