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Array ( [sid] => 102459 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Her Place.. [time] => 2005-08-01 20:30:33 [hometext] => This is the first poem I'm submitting...let me know what you think=]. [bodytext] => She lit it, and inhaled
The fumes embraced her, welcoming her home
She'd gone through every trial, and failed
It was here that she felt whole
Alone, on the steps
Lighting a cigarette
It was what she wanted, what she needed
She had a hunger and she needed to feed it
She closed her eyes
Envisioned his face
She remembered the lies
Then flew away to her place
Her love...her paradise...
"I hope you figure out which one you want to choose"
The words stung..cut her deep
She wasn't sure what she was willing to lose
And then again...what she was willing to keep
She loved him
There was nothing above him
Except this..this was her sanity
Her hope
Her fears
Her smiles
Her tears
She wanted to feel it
She needed to heal it
He told her he'd never leave her
She'd do anything to believe him
It took all she had to put down the knife
Two cuts it was and she was living her life
****ing it up the way she wanted to
Slowly moving in any way she could get through
He was a hipochrit
She was a liar
She spoke some words until it was lit
Then slowly stood as he pushed by her
He walked away like he always did
She wanted him, and he knew she'd lost all she could give
She wasn't the best
And she wasn't the worst
She laid her head to rest
And re-thought through their words
It was then she decided..it was then that she chose
I'll become another liar...and I'll go with the flow
Love, hate, humiliation, pain
It all came with the familiar face
And she was another stereotypical fake.
No, she was more
She was everything more..and it was written there
Big, and bold, and she knew she was sure
It's over
H'e gone
Her lover
His loss.
And hers, in a way.
So she sits on the steps and flys away to her place.
[comments] => 2 [counter] => 149 [topic] => 48 [informant] => sheaa [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => EmotionalPoetry )

Her Place..

Contributed by sheaa on Monday, 1st August 2005 @ 08:30:33 PM in AEST
Topic: EmotionalPoetry

She lit it, and inhaled
The fumes embraced her, welcoming her home
She'd gone through every trial, and failed
It was here that she felt whole
Alone, on the steps
Lighting a cigarette
It was what she wanted, what she needed
She had a hunger and she needed to feed it
She closed her eyes
Envisioned his face
She remembered the lies
Then flew away to her place
Her love...her paradise...
"I hope you figure out which one you want to choose"
The words stung..cut her deep
She wasn't sure what she was willing to lose
And then again...what she was willing to keep
She loved him
There was nothing above him
Except this..this was her sanity
Her hope
Her fears
Her smiles
Her tears
She wanted to feel it
She needed to heal it
He told her he'd never leave her
She'd do anything to believe him
It took all she had to put down the knife
Two cuts it was and she was living her life
****ing it up the way she wanted to
Slowly moving in any way she could get through
He was a hipochrit
She was a liar
She spoke some words until it was lit
Then slowly stood as he pushed by her
He walked away like he always did
She wanted him, and he knew she'd lost all she could give
She wasn't the best
And she wasn't the worst
She laid her head to rest
And re-thought through their words
It was then she decided..it was then that she chose
I'll become another liar...and I'll go with the flow
Love, hate, humiliation, pain
It all came with the familiar face
And she was another stereotypical fake.
No, she was more
She was everything more..and it was written there
Big, and bold, and she knew she was sure
It's over
H'e gone
Her lover
His loss.
And hers, in a way.
So she sits on the steps and flys away to her place.

Copyright © sheaa ... [ 2005-08-01 20:30:33]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Her Place.. (User Rating: 1 )
by pUnKa_RaCh on Monday, 1st August 2005 @ 09:28:33 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Amazing!!!

If this is your first poem you have ever written, it is very promising! You possess some excellent talent.

I found this to be very touching as I can very much relate to your thoughts, even to the point of losing the one you love and trying to rid the pain with a cigarette (that's me all over)

oh gosh, well done.

So emotive and honest.

Keep posting, people will read!

Re: Her Place.. (User Rating: 1 )
by Taurusgem1 on Tuesday, 2nd August 2005 @ 02:34:00 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

I think that it was good... In the begining there was great visuals but then they kind of went away I think you have a talent and i look forward to see how it developes..

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