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Array ( [sid] => 101314 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Gave it Back... [time] => 2005-07-15 23:31:08 [hometext] => This is based on true events, so just guess at the inside references. I'll probably do a rewrite later... [bodytext] =>
On February 14, in dwindled crowd, you silently gave back my card.
I deliberated on giving you anything, you know.
After all, we are – were – just friends, no affair.
But I still cared for you and found it…
Irresistible to give one last nice thing before I moved on.
To show my unhealthy addiction to pain you inflict
Why would you give it back?

This story really is close to coming full circle.
Remember back to the day before your birthday party.
You hinted at something to tell me, something saved for your party.
I knew what you would say later, before the other girl asked me
“Can I be your girlfriend?” and you wept.
Who were you hurting when you gave it back?

Late into the party, you pulled me aside into an empty room.
That room was your bedroom, and I felt as awkward
Being there as you felt when you tried to talk.
I echoed all you said: I like you.
Even so, my head floated and my heart swooned as we pulled together.
Just a hug? I will never have a first kiss because I had your first hug.
How could you give that back?

We were so lucky that I had happened to buy that tin of Altoids?.
We used it fourteen times as a part our group project.
You and I kept touching fingertips and smiling at each other.
When our friend twirled around and thought
Something was going on behind her,
We just giggled and worked on.
What was lost so you could give it back?

The last day of school was a celebration, and we saw the Harry Potter.
In your first theater with friends, I got to hold your cold hand.
I remember you said it was the only warm part of your body by the end.
My heart swelled as I felt swell, and an email asked you to be my girlfriend.
I was shocked when the nightly emails stopped, agonized that you never responded.
The Thursday in June marked the end of the good times and your favor.
Where were you that you could not give THAT back?

The rest of the story takes half a year, yet good times become scarcity.
First day back in school, you fumed that I didn’t fight over a petty thing for a week.
On my birthday, you wouldn’t leave the basement videogames to socialize with anyone.
You offered a belated birthday present, but never delivered.
I asked you to Homecoming, but you couldn’t and your parents were uncomfortable.
You regifted an extra birthday present, a duplicate Chinese CD, on Christmas.
I am a JERK because you couldn’t come to my New Years Day party.
Where does giving niceness not get it back?

I stayed on through pain and an extra semester.
You gave me nothing to go on but I was addicted to hope.
I didn’t dream you stabbed my eye when I kissed you: I told a metaphor.
I grieved and totally lost control late late into the night.
You see, I was already broken by the time of Valentine’s
My heart is gone, and I wish you could give that back.
[comments] => 1 [counter] => 195 [topic] => 22 [informant] => Evshrug [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 7 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => LostLove )

Gave it Back...

Contributed by Evshrug on Friday, 15th July 2005 @ 11:31:08 PM in AEST
Topic: LostLove

On February 14, in dwindled crowd, you silently gave back my card.
I deliberated on giving you anything, you know.
After all, we are – were – just friends, no affair.
But I still cared for you and found it…
Irresistible to give one last nice thing before I moved on.
To show my unhealthy addiction to pain you inflict
Why would you give it back?

This story really is close to coming full circle.
Remember back to the day before your birthday party.
You hinted at something to tell me, something saved for your party.
I knew what you would say later, before the other girl asked me
“Can I be your girlfriend?” and you wept.
Who were you hurting when you gave it back?

Late into the party, you pulled me aside into an empty room.
That room was your bedroom, and I felt as awkward
Being there as you felt when you tried to talk.
I echoed all you said: I like you.
Even so, my head floated and my heart swooned as we pulled together.
Just a hug? I will never have a first kiss because I had your first hug.
How could you give that back?

We were so lucky that I had happened to buy that tin of Altoids?.
We used it fourteen times as a part our group project.
You and I kept touching fingertips and smiling at each other.
When our friend twirled around and thought
Something was going on behind her,
We just giggled and worked on.
What was lost so you could give it back?

The last day of school was a celebration, and we saw the Harry Potter.
In your first theater with friends, I got to hold your cold hand.
I remember you said it was the only warm part of your body by the end.
My heart swelled as I felt swell, and an email asked you to be my girlfriend.
I was shocked when the nightly emails stopped, agonized that you never responded.
The Thursday in June marked the end of the good times and your favor.
Where were you that you could not give THAT back?

The rest of the story takes half a year, yet good times become scarcity.
First day back in school, you fumed that I didn’t fight over a petty thing for a week.
On my birthday, you wouldn’t leave the basement videogames to socialize with anyone.
You offered a belated birthday present, but never delivered.
I asked you to Homecoming, but you couldn’t and your parents were uncomfortable.
You regifted an extra birthday present, a duplicate Chinese CD, on Christmas.
I am a JERK because you couldn’t come to my New Years Day party.
Where does giving niceness not get it back?

I stayed on through pain and an extra semester.
You gave me nothing to go on but I was addicted to hope.
I didn’t dream you stabbed my eye when I kissed you: I told a metaphor.
I grieved and totally lost control late late into the night.
You see, I was already broken by the time of Valentine’s
My heart is gone, and I wish you could give that back.

Copyright Â© Evshrug ... [ 2005-07-15 23:31:08]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Gave it Back... (User Rating: 1 )
by thepizzaguy on Friday, 15th July 2005 @ 11:56:24 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

I have to say you express yourself excellently. Every word of the poem is well thought out. This poem tells the story, the painful story of what a man can go through after a breakup. I think girls today don't realize that gentlemen such as ourselves go through agony when one of the leaves us, because its not like we can have any girl at all. We must do the right thing and pick the girl who can carry on a conversation about Einstein and Space. And when we find those girls we hold on to them as long as possible. But when they leave us, it's agonizingly difficult to let go. This poem dipicts a gentlemen's struggle to let go, because he knows that the girls he dates are few and far between in this world, and he will not settle for some whore off the street corner. Excellent write.

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