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Array ( [sid] => 100358 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Marry Me? [time] => 2005-07-06 20:08:46 [hometext] => [bodytext] => Marry Me?

Compassion is shadowed
With hate mellowed
In carelessness
Of bliss.

If only you could be
The only one I want to see
From day to day as we waste
Farther and still more farther away.

Dress me in the whitest of all the gowns
So that shadows will not drown
Us in our lost love for life
And golden time.

Marry me please,
Or bury my need. [comments] => 16 [counter] => 403 [topic] => 43 [informant] => Essentially9 [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 25 [ratings] => 5 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => oops )
Marry Me?

Contributed by Essentially9 on Wednesday, 6th July 2005 @ 08:08:46 PM in AEST
Topic: oops



Marry Me?

Compassion is shadowed
With hate mellowed
In carelessness
Of bliss.

If only you could be
The only one I want to see
From day to day as we waste
Farther and still more farther away.

Dress me in the whitest of all the gowns
So that shadows will not drown
Us in our lost love for life
And golden time.

Marry me please,
Or bury my need.




Copyright © Essentially9 ... [ 2005-07-06 20:08:46]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: Marry Me? (User Rating: 1 )
by xxbreathlessx on Wednesday, 6th July 2005 @ 08:12:26 PM AEST
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this poem surprised me becuase it had sort of a dark twist, but i enjoyed it. the different elements do this poem good. short,simple and intriguing. good job.


Re: Marry Me? (User Rating: 1 )
by ForeverAlone on Wednesday, 6th July 2005 @ 08:16:24 PM AEST
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awesome jen, never fail to make everything you write have a dark part to it somehow...lol..as always lil sis,

~big bro (who loves it!) =]


Re: Marry Me? (User Rating: 1 )
by MorningDove on Wednesday, 6th July 2005 @ 08:30:12 PM AEST
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Guess no matter what, you just can't take the dark out of the girl! What to do, what to do, lol. Jenn, this is a great poem, but did we have to have a wedding and funeral dirge at the same time? lololol

Rita


Re: Marry Me? (User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on Wednesday, 6th July 2005 @ 09:53:45 PM AEST
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yes! YES! YESSSSSSSSSS!!!! LOL

I like the contrast and confliction of emotion that's so strong in this piece...To me, it's like a desperate call for help...To end a pain so deep, that maybe can never be fully erased. That's what I got from this...Right or wrong, I enjoyed your expression in this write, and the third stanza stood out the most for me.

Scorp.


Re: Marry Me? (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Wednesday, 6th July 2005 @ 09:59:00 PM AEST
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Yes I'll marry you baby
And your mind too for
each poem you write I
fall more in love with you
Thats just my way of saying
your writing is great
MUH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Joey


Re: Marry Me? (User Rating: 1 )
by Man_On_High on Wednesday, 6th July 2005 @ 10:33:28 PM AEST
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What a beautiful write-
3rd stanza's best..
and the last two lines give it the copyrighted tragic twist that is all yours.

Very well written..

B



Re: Marry Me? (User Rating: 1 )
by CarolinaBlue on Thursday, 7th July 2005 @ 01:13:48 AM AEST
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wonderful write! the expression is terrfic and the ending ties it up neatly, bittersweet.

~Blue~


Re: Marry Me? (User Rating: 1 )
by venkat on Thursday, 7th July 2005 @ 01:25:04 AM AEST
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"Dress me in the whitest of all the gowns"
."Marry me please, Or bury my need"
I feel this is a beautiful masterpiece...:-)venkat


Re: Marry Me? (User Rating: 1 )
by blowfish_jane on Thursday, 7th July 2005 @ 04:10:11 AM AEST
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Um no way sister. Im not into girls LOL J/K.

I did love the poem. It was short but it was packed with so much emotion to it. I liked it.

sorry for not commenting much. I've been to arsed to do so.

Jane xxx


Re: Marry Me? (User Rating: 1 )
by Bohemian_with_a_pen on Thursday, 7th July 2005 @ 07:19:14 AM AEST
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AMAZING, i love it!!


Re: Marry Me? (User Rating: 1 )
by Dorkfish on Thursday, 7th July 2005 @ 11:20:41 AM AEST
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That was sort of sweet, yet dark. A plea for love and help at the same time. Nice job. It had like a twist to it. Short, but enough to say the point. Great job!


Re: Marry Me? (User Rating: 1 )
by jyssvw22 on Thursday, 7th July 2005 @ 02:12:07 PM AEST
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a well devised request

a well written poem


Re: Marry Me? (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Thursday, 7th July 2005 @ 02:22:10 PM AEST
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This is beautiful and of course you are a

tottal geinus, the ending once again is the

the core of brilliance, love the ambiguity here

the play on having the cake and eating it 2 . . .

Ben


Re: Marry Me? (User Rating: 1 )
by xXcrossedXx on Saturday, 9th July 2005 @ 11:57:55 PM AEST
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This was beautiful, a masterpiece! Completely beautiful. I just realised all your pieces have even more meaning than they do when you first read them, I read this five times over before I made this comment, and I don't think it was a good idea because now I am completely speechless. This poem left a beautiful and glamorous feeling in my heart, thank you.
Keep up the writes, you are amazing.
.amanda.


Re: Marry Me? (User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on Thursday, 18th August 2005 @ 11:38:28 PM AEST
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Ah sad but very beautifully written. Very touching.
huggs,
emy


Re: Marry Me? (User Rating: 1 )
by reprobate on Saturday, 8th October 2005 @ 11:38:17 PM AEST
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i hear 'dido' playing in the background while reading this...just semms to fit for some reason.
great job but you know this.
thanks for sharing




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