|
 Menu
|
|
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
|
Array
(
[sid] => 94343
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Now You Care
[time] => 2005-05-14 11:26:35
[hometext] => Please comment... I really don't know if this is good or not!
[bodytext] => So now you care,
After someone,
Who once was barely
Worth your time,
Mentions
That perhaps there is
A problem
In her life.
It keeps her awake at night;
It keeps her together
And alive
But she wants
To fall apart,
Right in front of you
Just so you can see
The monster you have
Created
And raised,
Who has become so hopelessly attached
To one person,
The one person who
Understands her,
Who believes in her
More than you,
Who created her.
Now you care
After years of torture
And destruction
Of her faith and beliefs
After years of shouting at her
And informing her
Of how she is worthless;
A disgrace
To your perfect family
Complete with
A high school dropout,
And a teacher’s aide.
Now you care
And you expect her
To pour out her soul
To you,
Who has single-handedly
Killed her inside
And ruined
Everything
She could have become,
Everything she was.
You mangled
And distorted
The beautiful creation
That was she,
Your own daughter,
But she is still
Expected
To treat you like
The royalty
She once thought you were.
Now you care,
But you are too late,
For she no longer does.
[comments] => 8
[counter] => 222
[topic] => 13
[informant] => CBlake
[notes] =>
[ihome] => 0
[alanguage] => english
[acomm] => 0
[haspoll] => 0
[pollID] => 0
[score] => 18
[ratings] => 4
[editpoem] => 1
[associated] =>
[topicname] => DarkPoetry
)
Now You Care
Contributed by
CBlake
on
Saturday, 14th May 2005 @ 11:26:35 AM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
So now you care,
After someone,
Who once was barely
Worth your time,
Mentions
That perhaps there is
A problem
In her life.
It keeps her awake at night;
It keeps her together
And alive
But she wants
To fall apart,
Right in front of you
Just so you can see
The monster you have
Created
And raised,
Who has become so hopelessly attached
To one person,
The one person who
Understands her,
Who believes in her
More than you,
Who created her.
Now you care
After years of torture
And destruction
Of her faith and beliefs
After years of shouting at her
And informing her
Of how she is worthless;
A disgrace
To your perfect family
Complete with
A high school dropout,
And a teacher’s aide.
Now you care
And you expect her
To pour out her soul
To you,
Who has single-handedly
Killed her inside
And ruined
Everything
She could have become,
Everything she was.
You mangled
And distorted
The beautiful creation
That was she,
Your own daughter,
But she is still
Expected
To treat you like
The royalty
She once thought you were.
Now you care,
But you are too late,
For she no longer does.
Copyright ©
CBlake
... [
2005-05-14 11:26:35]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment.
That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: Now You Care
(User Rating: 1 )
by Pyrofungus on
Saturday, 14th May 2005 @ 12:57:05 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
i really liked it. my mom has also done the same to me. my dad too. were all affected by the people around us. our environment. they always come when its too late...
please comment on my work too
summer |
|
|
Re: Now You Care
(User Rating: 1 )
by Deep_Within_My_Heart on
Saturday, 14th May 2005 @ 01:07:59 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
I know exactly how you feel. My mom and dad are like that. They tell me that I am nothing but want me to be everything. They have put me down for years and when I tried to kill myself they noticed me. Now they are expecting me to talk to them about my life and why I am the way I am. To be honest there is nothing that you can do about it all you do is either tell them that you are not ready to tell them everything. Or tel them the truth!
Heather |
|
|
Re: Now You Care
(User Rating: 1 )
by dark_descent on
Saturday, 14th May 2005 @ 04:06:47 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
I can relate to this so much, and I felt your pain in every word. This was an amazing poem, thank you for sharing it.
Jen x |
|
|
Re: Now You Care
(User Rating: 1 )
by glassicallyunsuperficial on
Sunday, 15th May 2005 @ 04:00:24 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
I can so relate to this
except I don't really know my real 'creators'
But anyway, maybe she really do care.
Maybe she's just as confuse inside as we are.
Maybe she's learnt something from the past.
How 'bout giving her a chance?
Time is the best medicine
All the best |
|
|
Re: Now You Care
(User Rating: 1 )
by Faust on
Monday, 23rd May 2005 @ 09:46:12 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
This is a very sad feeling, but also one that makes some mad. this is a very good write. I think you captured the sadness and anger that comes from people who decide to finally think about others. I loved the "who has single-handedly killed her inside" line.
Eternally Punished,
Faust |
|
|
Re: Now You Care
(User Rating: 1 )
by freckle on
Wednesday, 1st June 2005 @ 08:22:16 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Another wonderful write. Deep, deep feelings shine through in this poem. If you wanted to arouse the feeling of empathy, you do it well. The last line I think you could have made stronger. Unless you wanted it to convey a sighing, what's the use, type of feeling. I think something stronger would fit better with the body of this poem. Howver, I still think it is wonderful as it is!
Carol |
|
|
Re: Now You Care
(User Rating: 1 )
by Dorkfish on
Tuesday, 21st June 2005 @ 06:23:41 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| That was very good! |
|
|
Re: Now You Care
(User Rating: 1 )
by Dorkfish on
Friday, 8th July 2005 @ 04:56:51 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| I thought that was excellent. Great job, I mean maybe parents should get a little more slack, but you said what we all felt at one point. Great expression, wording and style. I loved it! |
|
|
|
· 
Poetry
Community
Members
Areas
Reference
Search
Top
Others
