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Array ( [sid] => 82606 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Torment [time] => 2005-02-02 09:32:18 [hometext] => The insecurities of life can drive us to death. [bodytext] => I yearned, once,
For respite
From what was, to me,
A diminished, raptured world.

Life was my maze
And I a blind mouse,
Making my way
As best I could.

At each new day
I felt only pain.
I was cold and alone.
Always alone.

I struggled to find hope
Among the remains my ravaged soul,
Torn by years of denial...
Denial of the world and its ways.

And denial of myself.

Thus, I fell
Deep into the fathoms of my mind,
Neglecting the very essence
Of who I was... and who I'd become.

Driven by self-hatred,
The same hate I wielded, ignorantly,
A buckler to block out the world,
I withdrew into an existence of anger.

Now abandoned,
A singular and forsaken soul,
I, in turn, lost hope.
I lost faith in myself and the world.

I turned to what I knew,
And realized that my knowledge
No longer mattered.
What I knew was wrong.

And I was powerless.

I cried, then.
I wept for the world... I wept for me.
I yearned, then,
For respite...

Respite from myself,
Seeking a solace
Only given by the world.
A peace only found in what lies therein.

I reached out
From the chilling embrace of the darkness I created,
Placing my faith
In those around me

To come forth and rescue me...
Rescue me from myself.

And I waited.

I waited for so long a time.

I waited, but... there was nobody.

Nobody to help.

I had denied them all, thus
I was denied by them all.

Disheartened and overwhelmed
By infinite, crushing sadness,
I faced the dark,
Extending my arms.

I was stricken,
distraught,
angry,
sad,
cold...
and alone.
Always alone.

I spoke to the darkness there,
Begging for its icy touch
Upon my beaten soul.
Begging for release.

Was I to be denied even death?
Was I?

Or was I even still alive? [comments] => 2 [counter] => 665 [topic] => 39 [informant] => TheSpiritx [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 17 [ratings] => 4 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Grief )

Torment

Contributed by TheSpiritx on Wednesday, 2nd February 2005 @ 09:32:18 AM in AEST
Topic: Grief

I yearned, once,
For respite
From what was, to me,
A diminished, raptured world.

Life was my maze
And I a blind mouse,
Making my way
As best I could.

At each new day
I felt only pain.
I was cold and alone.
Always alone.

I struggled to find hope
Among the remains my ravaged soul,
Torn by years of denial...
Denial of the world and its ways.

And denial of myself.

Thus, I fell
Deep into the fathoms of my mind,
Neglecting the very essence
Of who I was... and who I'd become.

Driven by self-hatred,
The same hate I wielded, ignorantly,
A buckler to block out the world,
I withdrew into an existence of anger.

Now abandoned,
A singular and forsaken soul,
I, in turn, lost hope.
I lost faith in myself and the world.

I turned to what I knew,
And realized that my knowledge
No longer mattered.
What I knew was wrong.

And I was powerless.

I cried, then.
I wept for the world... I wept for me.
I yearned, then,
For respite...

Respite from myself,
Seeking a solace
Only given by the world.
A peace only found in what lies therein.

I reached out
From the chilling embrace of the darkness I created,
Placing my faith
In those around me

To come forth and rescue me...
Rescue me from myself.

And I waited.

I waited for so long a time.

I waited, but... there was nobody.

Nobody to help.

I had denied them all, thus
I was denied by them all.

Disheartened and overwhelmed
By infinite, crushing sadness,
I faced the dark,
Extending my arms.

I was stricken,
distraught,
angry,
sad,
cold...
and alone.
Always alone.

I spoke to the darkness there,
Begging for its icy touch
Upon my beaten soul.
Begging for release.

Was I to be denied even death?
Was I?

Or was I even still alive?

Copyright © TheSpiritx ... [ 2005-02-02 09:32:18]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Torment (User Rating: 1 )
by pixie on Wednesday, 2nd February 2005 @ 09:39:37 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

I just had to read this as insecurites are playing a big part in helping to kill my relationship right now, this poem spoke of such fear and pain, written well, expressed from your heart
pix xx

Re: Torment (User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on Wednesday, 2nd February 2005 @ 03:20:06 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

wow......... beautiful expression of feelings, hugs n' love nessa

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