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Array
(
[sid] => 81999
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Pure happiness
[time] => 2005-01-29 14:35:10
[hometext] => About family problems.. I live with my grandparents but this is mainly about how my grandma makes me feel most of the time... comment on plz I want to know what you think
[bodytext] => The girl so joyous constantly, her face glowed with her beaming smile, The smile now distorted into a look of anticipated worry every waking day, The glistening sun peeps through her window, but only for a short while, But the arguments undoubtedly flood in, happiness feels so far away. Happiness seems so dauntingly distant , she's not even a quarter of the way, She feels so helpless, tried every possible solution, but she always miserably fails, You're killing us slowly, so painfully, is what they always feel the need to say, But she can't comprehend what she's done; she sits alone, isolated and painfully wails. I dream, I wish with an undying passion to have pure happiness in my life, I've done everything I can but somehow the pain jolts through my soul everytime, I admit my faults, I say I'm sorry and prove it, happiness I clearly strife, But it never even kindly offers to stop by, I pray it does sometime. Screams take over my entire brain capacity, digs are dragging me down, I explain this as clearly as the crystal skies that appear on a pleasant day, You're mental, you pick fights, these are the comments that plunge me down, I love her so much it hurts intensely.. I sincerely hope that gets through to her someday. She never apologises although I apologise for no reason, I forgive her once more, An unnerving feeling uncomfortably hovers over me that she hates me with all her might, I want her love to happily greet me, just naturally, in all honesty I ask for no more, But she always refuses, almost restrains herself, to give up her never- ending fight. One day I can struggle out of this mess, get myself along the road I wish to be lead, I'll always yearn for love in any shape or form, but I know from family thats what Ill never get, I don't think I'll ever be able to loosen my grasp on the horrible things that were always said, Nevertheless I'll still value my family so greatly even after the cold torment and upset. [comments] => 1 [counter] => 157 [topic] => 14 [informant] => xx_lil_devilish_angel_xx [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => DreamsandWishes )
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