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Array
(
[sid] => 72981
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Whut & Who I Am
[time] => 2004-11-24 11:00:59
[hometext] =>
[bodytext] => *WHUT & WHO I AM * I'm an advocate of agony & a connoisseur of suffering.. Of all my SINdromes... The pain is all I can sincerely trust.. ...The only truth.... . My dangerous weapon I harness for spiritual gain & growth.. A deliberate insanity, Mental alchemy... I take this entire negative spectrum & turn it into golden creative perfection.. ..Artistic invention... I exist for my art.. It is my panacea, It' is everything about me here... The sentences speak in paragraphs to me, My mind speaks in inspirations, chants, & poetry... I am a Hedonist, I'm here to live & not just merely exist.. I enjoy my life...all of it.. I learn to find the positive in the negative..The pretty amongst the ugly... ...Everything is soaked in the beauty you imbue it with... I explore different angles & perspectives.. ....Expand your mind... ........Explore....... Get more. I'm not afraid of this pain & my weakness's.. ...Of my beautiful suffering... I'm not afraid to admit My mistakes, My faults.. No. ..No fear harbored of taking the good with the bad.. Of taking the sweet milk & honey with a pinch of salt.. Its taste no longer revolts me.. ..Infact I quite enjoy it now I have an acquired taste... I no longer hate any of this anymore.. . Because I love them all.. ..My interesting flaws... They make up such a large& important part of the me I now respect... All coincides to make who I am today.. Without them I’d be incomplete.. Without them. I’d be $hit. ..None of this would even be worth it... Yes I'm over opinionated.. Yes I love & fear that which I’ve become... ...& No it's not wrong for me to love myself so very completely... I know I’m special.. & anyone who thinks that because I admit this it means I’m self obsessed & selfish.. ...really doesn't know me... I give so much… & I’d do anything to please those who matter to me… ..I am my own creation .. I love whut I’ve made… ..& no one can ever take that away. Oh how I pity you.. Pathetic weak, jealous creatures... ...you'd love to feel like this just once... ..Just one morsel.. ...one scrap... I have learnt to live this game of life...It's my turn so pass the dice... I'm avant garde, A prodigy.. I know so much....yet it's not enough for me.. ..I'm not full yet.. I voraciously consume knowledge.. The nurturing milk, The sweet ambrosia of experience & learning... …The joy of discovery. ..I hear the whisperings of the hidden ones.. They speak in soft verses of ancient tongues.. & every day I give them thanks For sharing their secrets.. For Bestowing me with this miscellany of great, divine gifts... ....I vow to use them wisely... I'm enigmatic like the Cheshire cat.. I want to help lead others, take them under my wing.. & teach.. But I will not spoon feed them the answers... ..I want them to experience the arcane of self discovery for themselves. I dream of raining ash, & azure hazes.. Falling fragments of poetry pages... ..Blackened edges glowing & curling back in Aesthetical abandon.. An appocoliptic Firmament with a red sky of warning.. Insects scream in my head with wings white light burning... My soul is a somnambulist, & my mind relishes in it’s reveries.. I know my rights.. ..But I’m willing to wave them.. I make my prognosis.. & freely quench my thirst on the emetic.. ..I'd give so much just for this feeling... Sabotage the scabs of my wounds that were healing.. No cure for me, No cure for my sickness... A defiance to heal, Infected I need this.. As long as I’m suffering I know that I’m living.. It hurts to exist but it's whut i believe in.. No cure for me, No cure that I need.. Content in this place.. I need my disease. I am tenacious in my beliefs, I'm a pioneer, A renegade... I know fear well & so I’m not afraid.. ...save for being scared of myself... I'll take the risks & be elated.. I'll do as I wish & not be left devastated.. ...I will aspire to become whut I desire... (c)Dominick Destruction 24/08/04 [comments] => 3 [counter] => 183 [topic] => 21 [informant] => Dominick-destruction [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Lifepoems )
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