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Array
(
[sid] => 59049
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => I Will Never Leave You
[time] => 2004-08-05 17:58:51
[hometext] => saying goodbye to my friends is the hardest part in all of this...
[bodytext] => While you're all just beginning, I have reached the end. I was born with injuries that doctors couldn't mend. No one here could 'save' me or take away my pain. Mo one here could change the very structure of my brain. I tried to change the thoughts I had, tried changing what I felt. I tried to make the best out of the cards I had been dealt. But obviously my efforts weren't rewarded with success. Eventually I lost all hope of finding 'happiness'. This decision wasn't easy, but it's one I had to make. I simply can't acknowledge that my birth was no mistake. Each person has a reason for being on this earth. There's got to be some logic in each successful birth. I guess, for some, their reason is more difficult to see. For a primary example, just take a look at me. I never found my reason 'cause I didn't really try. I knew that it was useless to search for reasons why. At the end of the day, I guess one thing that I knew. Was that no one here sees life from my same point of view. It's useless to explain why I've done what I have done. 'Cause the reasons are not simple; there are many, not just one. What I found the hardest here was saying my goodbye. Pretending all was normal, while trying not to cry. For you, it was another day. For me, it was the end. The very last goodbye to my amazing friends. You'll never know how much you've meant to me throughout these years. The impact that you've had on me is proven by these tears. I guess what kept me strong is knowing I've not gone away. I'll be looking down from heaven, I'll be with you every day. I hope that you forgive me, but even if you don't. I will never leave you; I couldn't and I won't... [comments] => 3 [counter] => 193 [topic] => 36 [informant] => hurthurthurt [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Suicide )
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