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Array
(
[sid] => 54510
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => without you.
[time] => 2004-07-02 11:14:11
[hometext] => to my mother: i hope everything you love dies in your arms.
[bodytext] => i am in my own world and you are stuck in yours the only difference between here and there is that i got to leave you even thought you sent me away i still choose not to come back becuase now that im free from you im finally free from me you tortured me and you twisted my mind you lost me yet you saved my life but instead of forgiving you im forgetting you i choose to live my life without you and without a mothers guidance and without a mothers love becuase i can do anything without you and i have overcome addictions without you and i have been raped and beaten and all i had was myself - not you all i have is my pen and paper all this you have caused me has given me this gift of pain and how to express and i want to express ym pain to you tell me have you ever held a crackpipe to your lips shaking and drooling for just a high have you ever been so drunk that when you came to there was a ***** ***** you? tell me have you ever lived believing you reality is a lie? i used to live for my next fix but i conquored that for a man whos addicted to me someone who needs me more than i need myself i have survived myself but i am still surviving and i will win i just want you to understand what its like o fall asleep with one life and wake up with a new one becuase thats what i did and thats what i do and everyday i think about yo and how you made me this. [comments] => 4 [counter] => 168 [topic] => 55 [informant] => i_have_no_name [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 5 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => dedicatedpoems )
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