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Array
(
[sid] => 16946
[catid] => 1
[aid] => Mick
[title] => ~Things I wish I did not say..Did eventually take you away~
[time] => 2003-05-03 13:35:00
[hometext] => I think we have all experienced saying things to people we love in the moment of a heated arguement that we later regret. But sometimes we forget that we can not take back words. And those words can destroy the relationships we treasure most.
[bodytext] => Things said in the heat of the moment
Whether it was shouted or spoken, Can never take away these feelings.. And here I lay.. ...thinking of you ...thinking of me, & I know I was set in my ways, But this I promise you If you were to give me one more chance I would never make a fool out of you I would show you a person that hid from the world.. Things I say make so much sense Until they take you away Then I lay here thinking Of the reasons that made me say All those words that hurt you so I hope forever you will know That everything that I say Eventually takes all the people away That I love and admire and leaves me with this desire to become someone else, But it never does happen... And here I lay in a bed of regret Wondering why I was so cruel And all those words said to you I hate myself, for hurting you, for leaving myself alone again, and my daughter too. To be what...someone who loves you, and wants you back.. But until the worst is done, only then do I realize what I lack... For I want to become someone else.. Not what I hate.. But in the end I see... That all along you had this impression me But it is you that is better than me.. I guess I stand on this pedestal handed down to me One that I never was able to stand up straight on anyway Always left me yearning for a better day But now I see.. When that day did reach me.. I was too far up on this imaginary.. fake and beyond self-help place where I let everything that meant anything.. .. fade away into what seemed like yesterdays heavenly place to be.. And it left me thinking what could be??.. But my words erased all of that.. Never to become any of the above.. So my self-righteous attitude.. Left something that I alone could not fued.. But I love you Kevin..& not knowing what to do with that.. The truth is I never did.... So if I made you happy ..what was it?? For I will do it again.. But if you no longer want to look at this face.. Never wanting to come back to a place.. Where someone did love you.. But knew not what to do... .... Just know this.. That honestly, I did and still do ... ..Love you [comments] => 3 [counter] => 269 [topic] => 50 [informant] => capergirl_23 [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => ApologyPoetry )
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