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Array ( [sid] => 166811 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Ocean of Sorrow [time] => 2011-07-19 03:08:19 [hometext] => Like many of my poems, this is a metaphor, although this one is fairly straightforward. [bodytext] => Drifting through an ocean of sorrow,
and drowning in the current of tomorrow,

Racing boldly where no one wants to go,
as the boat collapses and you frantically row,

but the oars somehow fade into the water's surface,
destroying your faith... and corrupting your purpose...

eyes turn off course... goals are forgotten,
barely staying afloat ...in a boat that is rotten,

life crumbles around you... with no land in sight,
with your eyes on the water... you can't win the fight,

Don't come out and save me... or you may drown too,
Just throw me an oar... and I'll escape the dark blue. [comments] => 10 [counter] => 325 [topic] => 13 [informant] => deusdeira [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 0 [associated] => [topicname] => DarkPoetry )

Ocean of Sorrow

Contributed by deusdeira on Tuesday, 19th July 2011 @ 03:08:19 AM in AEST
Topic: DarkPoetry

Drifting through an ocean of sorrow,
and drowning in the current of tomorrow,

Racing boldly where no one wants to go,
as the boat collapses and you frantically row,

but the oars somehow fade into the water's surface,
destroying your faith... and corrupting your purpose...

eyes turn off course... goals are forgotten,
barely staying afloat ...in a boat that is rotten,

life crumbles around you... with no land in sight,
with your eyes on the water... you can't win the fight,

Don't come out and save me... or you may drown too,
Just throw me an oar... and I'll escape the dark blue.

Copyright © deusdeira ... [ 2011-07-19 03:08:19]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Ocean of Sorrow (User Rating: 1 )
by Banjosandwitch on Tuesday, 19th July 2011 @ 06:44:27 AM AEST
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cuplets surblime nice one

Re: Ocean of Sorrow (User Rating: 1 )
by UNORTHODOX on Tuesday, 19th July 2011 @ 01:29:09 PM AEST
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Beautifully captivating
the essence of mastering
the art of poetry is abundant here
I truly felt and heard every word, every line
i must say this write is immaculate,
and the message profound

-UNORTHODOX

Re: Ocean of Sorrow (User Rating: 1 )
by poeticjestix on Tuesday, 19th July 2011 @ 02:29:18 PM AEST
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at least it isn't windy and the waves aren't up to much.

Re: Ocean of Sorrow (User Rating: 1 )
by Jen54 on Tuesday, 19th July 2011 @ 04:36:09 PM AEST
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Wonderful write...

Re: Ocean of Sorrow (User Rating: 1 )
by myheartsvoice on Monday, 25th July 2011 @ 04:18:42 PM AEST
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Very vivid very powerful emotions
went into this piece, insperational
to all who are no stranger, to pain.

my♥svoice

Ben :)

Re: Ocean of Sorrow (User Rating: 1 )
by FlintHunter on Monday, 5th September 2011 @ 06:46:24 PM AEST
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What a special poem. I love the metaphors -- and believe me -- I can easily RELATE to the feelings you express in writing. It flows, this poem, like the ocean -- and that might even become an ocean of joy. Such exist. We have to keep reminding ourselves: they are... they are...

Well, some store must sell oars... an oar store, I guess... I'll get you one whenever you need it which I hope you never do. Great poem! --flinthunter

Re: Ocean of Sorrow (User Rating: 1 )
by Recyclebin on Tuesday, 6th September 2011 @ 06:04:06 PM AEST
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Loved this piece, the imagery was captivating.
Thanks for sharing.
~Bin~

Re: Ocean of Sorrow (User Rating: 1 )
by Balto on Friday, 7th October 2011 @ 04:56:29 AM AEST
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This is by far the best poem I've read here so far.
Although I'm new to the site, I can't see the next 10 poems
triumphing it.

I felt it.

Balto

Re: Ocean of Sorrow (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Thursday, 27th October 2011 @ 04:27:21 PM AEST
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this was touching. i'm going through that now. you wrote exactly the way it is. you have talent.

Re: Ocean of Sorrow (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Wednesday, 29th February 2012 @ 12:14:43 AM AEST
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Oh, sad. Full of despair and hopelessness. Definitely know these feelings. (especially back in July 2011 ! ! ! --- talk about drawing a parallel) Yet, in the end, throwing one an oar, a plea for help, is still a sign of hope.

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