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Array ( [sid] => 150695 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Underneath Her Skin [time] => 2009-06-12 17:27:38 [hometext] => this is the first poem I've submitted on here...I would appreciate feedback [bodytext] => She's a seemingly innocent blonde girl
Sitting there in church
Yet if you knew what she had done
The stuff would make you lurch

She despises her parents
She uses all her friends
She's never felt an ounce of love
Never will until the end

Everyone she knows
Is caught up in her web of lies
Yet if you look into her face
You'll just see innocent eyes

She isn't really happy
She kind of wants to change
She wonders why no one likes her
She knows she's very strange

At the same time she's happy
She wants to stay the same
She considers herself untouchable
Thinks that life is just a game

You stare at her and wonder
Is she really what she seems?
You look at her, awe in your eyes
Does she say what she means?

She does have a trace of remorse
Deep down inside her heart
There is a third layer just like the first
It's tearing her apart

But the people are blind
They don't seem to see
The person I just described
Is what lies inside of me [comments] => 3 [counter] => 377 [topic] => 75 [informant] => Adielae [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 13 [ratings] => 3 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => anguished )

Underneath Her Skin

Contributed by Adielae on Friday, 12th June 2009 @ 05:27:38 PM in AEST
Topic: anguished

She's a seemingly innocent blonde girl
Sitting there in church
Yet if you knew what she had done
The stuff would make you lurch

She despises her parents
She uses all her friends
She's never felt an ounce of love
Never will until the end

Everyone she knows
Is caught up in her web of lies
Yet if you look into her face
You'll just see innocent eyes

She isn't really happy
She kind of wants to change
She wonders why no one likes her
She knows she's very strange

At the same time she's happy
She wants to stay the same
She considers herself untouchable
Thinks that life is just a game

You stare at her and wonder
Is she really what she seems?
You look at her, awe in your eyes
Does she say what she means?

She does have a trace of remorse
Deep down inside her heart
There is a third layer just like the first
It's tearing her apart

But the people are blind
They don't seem to see
The person I just described
Is what lies inside of me

Copyright © Adielae ... [ 2009-06-12 17:27:38]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Underneath Her Skin (User Rating: 1 )
by Loende on Friday, 12th June 2009 @ 05:57:20 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

A very good first post. I think that you'll find
that a lot of people have the very same
problems. We are all false, all sinners, in
some way, until we make up our minds to
accept ourselves for who and what we are.
Until we decide to change and really
be who we let the world see.

Be brave. And keep writing.

Be well,
~Loende

Re: Underneath Her Skin (User Rating: 1 )
by FRANCO on Friday, 12th June 2009 @ 08:02:06 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Dear friend, it's a wonderful poem; congratulations on your first poem here.
Yes you are so very true, we as a human with all our weakness try to put up a face to the society which is not what we are...what we really are is what is beneath the third layer from within.

And my friend, to know and to understand that layer one need to have an eyes filled with love, compassion and understanding.
GOD BLESS YOU
With lots of love and respect,
FRANCO

Re: Underneath Her Skin (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Wednesday, 16th September 2020 @ 01:55:49 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

quite good

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