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Array ( [sid] => 150629 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => If I Could [time] => 2009-06-10 13:43:30 [hometext] => This is was the second poem i ever wrote. I keep it as a reminder, because i know that yes maybe i would but the reason I cant is becuase of the ones i hold dear to my heart. [bodytext] => If I could cut myself I would,
But I know it solves nothing.

In my mind I see the blood,
Flowing gently down my arm.
Only hoping to stop the pain,
But nothing...

If I could I would hurt someone,
Pointless violence just to feel better.

My fists punching them,
Just to make them hurt,
Hurt like me. It solves nothing...

I would kill myself if I could,
To stop the pictures of her from going through my brain.

The white floor dyed crimson,
Gave it all to you,
And I would lose it all.
If only I could...
[comments] => 3 [counter] => 199 [topic] => 48 [informant] => Everlasting_Flame [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 5 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => EmotionalPoetry )
If I Could

Contributed by Everlasting_Flame on Wednesday, 10th June 2009 @ 01:43:30 PM in AEST
Topic: EmotionalPoetry



If I could cut myself I would,
But I know it solves nothing.

In my mind I see the blood,
Flowing gently down my arm.
Only hoping to stop the pain,
But nothing...

If I could I would hurt someone,
Pointless violence just to feel better.

My fists punching them,
Just to make them hurt,
Hurt like me. It solves nothing...

I would kill myself if I could,
To stop the pictures of her from going through my brain.

The white floor dyed crimson,
Gave it all to you,
And I would lose it all.
If only I could...




Copyright © Everlasting_Flame ... [ 2009-06-10 13:43:30]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: If I Could (User Rating: 1 )
by Theatrelife on Wednesday, 10th June 2009 @ 02:53:43 PM AEST
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If i were you in the 5th stanza line one i would change it to "If i could kill myself, I would". Only because the repetition would be much more pleasing to the eye and the brain. The whole poem would stick more.


Re: If I Could (User Rating: 1 )
by hoist1atca on Wednesday, 10th June 2009 @ 11:26:18 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
Verry well written-
The pain of the heart is strong yet is outweighed by the love inside that special place-
It's good to see that you hold on to the love and put asside the pain-
Bravo-
Joe


Re: If I Could (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Friday, 16th October 2009 @ 04:18:06 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
Very powerful, emotional stuff.

-Phil




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