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Array
(
[sid] => 135626
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Trapped
[time] => 2007-06-29 10:06:53
[hometext] => This was written the day before I caught my man of 10 years cheating on me.
[bodytext] => my existance seems so pointless, so hopeless and lonely I know them not to be truths, no matter what they've told me honesty must be too difficult, for your every word is laced with lies my mind strewn with heartache, tears and my sorrowful cries Each sentence that falls from your tongue is manipulating every day I silently sit, painfully waiting to trust again, to feel secure, to feel comforted and understood, these things everyone needs, only few have, but everyone should why does it seem that my heart has built an impenatrable wall and my mind climbs painfully to the top, only to fall back to the isolation below, the despair that traps my very soul the seeping sadness that has overtaken my life and taken a toll on my sanity and everything that makes me who you once knew I am no longer happy in life, little things or anything I do my mind is occupied continuously, reliving my past thinking of times when you lied, hurt and put me last the people in my life don't truly love me or care it's simply more convinient for me to be there things have to change or I cannot survive In the dark my soul cannot possibly thrive When I was young I thought I was meant for so much more how can I doubt my self worth, my being, my very core? Living this way has made me question myself not care about consequences, the future or my health I'm dying a little more with every breath I take soon I'll be gone, when there is no more desire to wake my heart withered and broken, my body a torturous cell someday I'll be free, and in the wind is where I'll dwell, no more pain, no more lies, no more solitude, no more sorrow just the pleasuring thought that, at last, there is no tomorrow [comments] => 8 [counter] => 288 [topic] => 48 [informant] => Poess [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 14 [ratings] => 3 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => EmotionalPoetry )
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