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Array
(
[sid] => 117433
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => The Man Who Invented Trousers
[time] => 2006-03-31 05:18:53
[hometext] =>
[bodytext] => George Bryan Brummell went down to his garden shed It was autumn 1820 and it was raining George was an inventor of sorts Tinkering in his shed was his true joy Playing with his lathe and chisels and screws He really wanted a Black and Decker power drill But they hadn’t been invented yet And George was in a hurry to die penniless in a French asylum George was an inventor of sorts Not a great inventor But an inventor of sorts He was probably best known for a pair of shoes For walking on water But they didn’t work very well and people drowned And we have boats now anyway. So fame avoided George like feet should avoid lawnmower blades But on that wet autumn day in 1820 George Bryan Brummell dared to poke a toe into the Flymo of history A perpetual motion machine in the making It doubled as a corkscrew Brummell’s mind was tampering with the impossible Yet he dreamt of being a John Logie Baird or Alexander Graham Bell But they hadn’t been born yet Which is why he was to die penniless in a French asylum Another screw here, a drop of paraffin there A wallop with a claw hammer A puff of smoke Flames An explosion of sorts Big sorts George called the fire brigade But neither phones nor fire brigades had been invented yet And George wished that he was dying penniless in a French asylum The smoke cleared It took some days But the smoke cleared George Bryan Brummell ventured back into his garden shed It wasn’t raining anymore Which was good because the shed didn’t have a roof Or walls Just ash and a handsome pair of Khaki slacks George Bryan Brummell recognised them immediately as trousers The word trousers hadn’t been invented yet But George knew it would just as soon as he had died penniless in a French asylum George Bryan Brummell died penniless in a French asylum Twenty years after inventing trousers Did that make him a pantaloony? [comments] => 6 [counter] => 551 [topic] => 7 [informant] => faiton [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 20 [ratings] => 4 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => HumorPoetry )
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