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Array ( [sid] => 114664 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => This Pain [time] => 2006-02-11 19:30:03 [hometext] => This is about what i use to do to myself that i got through with tons of help. please comment about it. [bodytext] => What is this pain that I have inside?
I've never felt like this before.
I want to do something to relieve this pain.
Something more than just writing it down.
That won't help.
"Sam. Go take your shower."
"ok mom!"
nows my chance.
to do something i've never done before.
i get in the shower and before i wash my body
i grab my razor.
and drag it across my arm.
the pain makes me feel better.
i just keep cutting and cutting
forgetting the reason why i was mad.
i feel so much better.
when i get done,
i clean my cuts and put band aids on them.
i walk out of the bathroom in the same mood
as i went in.
i don't want my parents to know.
then i'll be in trouble.
they might send me away,
but i don't care.
i feel better.
i haven't felt this way for a while.
i feel so free.
so happy.
like nothing could go wrong.
my cuts heal as i make more on top of them.
My friends are scared i'll get sent away.
They hate it that i cut.
they're scared i'll hurt myself.
My mom and dad found out today.
They were really scared.
My heart stopped when my mom saw the marks.
i tried not to cry
as i explained why
my parents are scared. They're tryin to find help for me.
They put me in counseling
hoping i'll stop.
that i'll find something to turn to.
so i wouldnt cut.
my friends are glad
that i got help
that i quit
now we're all happy
and none of us are cutting.
we've moved on with life
like nothing happened.
[comments] => 4 [counter] => 291 [topic] => 31 [informant] => Strawberry [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 8 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => StoryPoetry )

This Pain

Contributed by Strawberry on Saturday, 11th February 2006 @ 07:30:03 PM in AEST
Topic: StoryPoetry

What is this pain that I have inside?
I've never felt like this before.
I want to do something to relieve this pain.
Something more than just writing it down.
That won't help.
"Sam. Go take your shower."
"ok mom!"
nows my chance.
to do something i've never done before.
i get in the shower and before i wash my body
i grab my razor.
and drag it across my arm.
the pain makes me feel better.
i just keep cutting and cutting
forgetting the reason why i was mad.
i feel so much better.
when i get done,
i clean my cuts and put band aids on them.
i walk out of the bathroom in the same mood
as i went in.
i don't want my parents to know.
then i'll be in trouble.
they might send me away,
but i don't care.
i feel better.
i haven't felt this way for a while.
i feel so free.
so happy.
like nothing could go wrong.
my cuts heal as i make more on top of them.
My friends are scared i'll get sent away.
They hate it that i cut.
they're scared i'll hurt myself.
My mom and dad found out today.
They were really scared.
My heart stopped when my mom saw the marks.
i tried not to cry
as i explained why
my parents are scared. They're tryin to find help for me.
They put me in counseling
hoping i'll stop.
that i'll find something to turn to.
so i wouldnt cut.
my friends are glad
that i got help
that i quit
now we're all happy
and none of us are cutting.
we've moved on with life
like nothing happened.

Copyright © Strawberry ... [ 2006-02-11 19:30:03]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: This Pain (User Rating: 1 )
by OzChick on Saturday, 11th February 2006 @ 09:10:20 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

I am honoured to be the first to comment on your poem. I'm so glad you stopped cutting yourself, I'm glad you got help. I commend you for having the courage to face your fears in therapy and for sharing your story. Stay strong.

~Jenny~

Re: This Pain (User Rating: 1 )
by NoSaint on Sunday, 12th February 2006 @ 07:04:19 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

You are strong and you show others that this can be overcome ...you are to be commended for sharing your story

NS

Re: This Pain (User Rating: 1 )
by crazy on Sunday, 12th February 2006 @ 08:31:16 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

ok its good that you got help because i had to ask for it it was so hard and i still want to do it.i did get sent to a mental hospital it was the best thing for me.and trust me at first it is so f ing hard but it gets easyer.and something that i do if i feel like cutting hold an ice cub in your hand till it burns.i so totally understand you good poem

Re: This Pain (User Rating: 1 )
by Fionndruinne on Tuesday, 14th March 2006 @ 06:42:29 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

A caring family and friends are invaluable in life, especially in hard times like this. No one is an island, they say, and it's certainly true, yet so many people try to be just that.

Keep on writing.

Andrew

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