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Array
(
[sid] => 113073
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Everything I'd like to achieve.
[time] => 2006-01-12 21:47:18
[hometext] => Comments are appreciated.
[bodytext] => It feels so deep here now, like quicksand breaking apart; Feels like everyone will change how I am eventually. It’s inevitable, how quickly I’ll lose myself in this situation. Just sit back and listen as you rip up the shards of me. In fear of what I might say or do next, I live like I’ll be here forever, without any confidence at all anymore. Playing up the fact that I’m confused, like the rest. This isn’t how I’m supposed to be living. Marked up pages and new faces change my whole outlook. It’s neither optimistic, nor pessimistic, yet towards more chaos. Underneath the attempts of closure, lies a piece of me wanting to continue on. Something I’ve put so much dedication into, and watched fall apart. Enough of the nodding and looking at the clock out of the corner of my eye, I need to pay attention to the fact that this really isn’t such a goodbye. More of a new beginning to get everything together, Come back in a few months and make them beg to have the me which I bettered. I’m half way there already, with the new change in routine. And my focus is slightly turning towards everything I’d want to achieve. [comments] => 1 [counter] => 201 [topic] => 25 [informant] => silentpwn [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => MiscPoems )
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